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Joey Sets A New Shrimp Cocktail World Record!

12-08-2014

Start the year with a win. End the year with a win. Win as many as you can in the days and weeks and months in between. Do that year in, year out. Do that and they will call you The Champ.

The Champ came, he ate and he conquered. Lend me your ears: The Champ ate 10.42lb of the World Famous St Elmo Shrimp Cocktail in eight minutes. The St Elmo Shrimp Cocktail is not like other shrimp cocktails, its horseradish-laden sauce a fiery, sinus-clearing challenge for any man or woman. But not, it would seem, The Champ.

The Champ eats without fear or care or concern. He gives no quarter to his foe—human or foodstuff. He takes his last bite as he does his first, each and every sinew of his body directed to victory. Chomp, chomp, chomp—one bowl of St Elmo Shrimp Cocktail disappearing after another. The next dies like the last. The crowd chants his name. They know it like they know their own, like they know their address, their social security number, their mother's maiden name, the name of their first pet, their AngiesList.com log in and password details. His name, his name, his name. The chant rings out for one and one only. His name. As metronomic as the mouth that it made known in households from east to west and all points in between. It is known in Indianapolis, IN, where the faithful brave the cold and the crowd for a glimpse of their hero. Their hero doing what he does better than anyone else on the planet. Hitherto and henceforth. Ab aerterno. Ad infinitum.

The Champ. You know his name. Don't play the fool and pretend otherwise.

FULL RESULTS! 1st - Joey Chestnut, 10.42lb in 8 mins 2nd - Sonya Thomas, 6.83lb 3rd - Jeff Butler, 6.52lb 4th - Yasir Salem, 4.42lb 4th - Joe Staysniak, 4.42lb 6th - Matthew Raible, 4.25lb 7th - Andrew Kogutkiewicz, 3.83lb 8yh - Tracy Goode, 3lb

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