"I.M. Fletcher You Choose"

Crazy Legs Conti, one-time french cut Green Bean Eating champ of the world and current Lumberjack Breakfast Eating champ of the world, entered the Netflix Movie Watching Arena at noon on Thursday, October 2nd.

In the heart of Times Square Conti sat in a plexiglass arena. He watched Iron Man and moved on to numerous other movies, Alien and Braveheart among them, sitting side-by-side with the greatest movie watchers in the world. Suresh Joachim of Sri Lankan descent, Claudia Wavra of Germany, a guy named Jerry from Staten Island.

Crazy Legs was among eight. Two failed before him. He hung tough. His goal? To make it to Fletch. He made it to Fletch some 32 hours into the Netflix Marathon before suffering a terrible nod of the head. Conti hadn't fallen asleep, but he had taken his eyes off the screen. That my friends is as bad as a NARF.

John Coqtostin has left Times Square. He's left a better man. He does, however, need some ball bearings and some two-in-one oil.

*The Netflix Movie Watching World Championship is taking place on Times Square's Military Island, the exact location of the Columbus Day Famous Famiglia Pizza Eating Championship.